Cover Songs: Deal or No Deal?

I do love a bit of Karaoke; a random Thursday night in a pub that’s been designed to look much older than it actually is; farming implements adorn the walls. The bloke at the bar on a stool hasn’t moved all night, occasionally engages the bar staff in conversation. There’s a big blonde chick walking around who seems to know everyone and you can’t quite figure out if she’s an employee or a regular. Then you’ve got Mike and his Karaoke machine; his little black book is making its way slowly around the room. Usually I’d thumb through to S and find Simon & Garfunkel…

Then you’ve got the classic Open Mic night. In my opinion, more dangerous than Karaoke; a minefield of hits and misses, weirdos and undiscovered talent mingle alike. At least with Karaoke people know the songs to sing along to. I’ve been to Open Mic nights where performers have taken the audience on their personal journey, painstakingly crooning their way through their “latest song”, an insight into their chaotic lives where in fact you feel you’d actually be more comfortable sitting naked at your place of work massaging Bovril into your hair, having your feet immersed into cold ketchup and subsequently licked by a delinquent dog. You raise your glass to take a drink, pausing briefly to cringe as the performer lets fly another drawn out chorus of “I looooooooved yoooooooou!” You glance around the room and know that everyone is secretly thinking the same thing, “Why didn’t he just sing Wonderwall?!”

Cover songs serve a purpose – of course they do. They’re entertaining; people know where they stand however there is one thing that really rubs me up the wrong way and that is professional Karaoke singers – people I’m talking mainly about X-Factor. Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t missed the fact that it is a fantastically entertaining show with all the ensuing drama that goes with it. What annoys me the most is the fact that millions of people actually believe that these professional Karaoke artists are genuinely talented folk with the gravitas to shift millions of albums based entirely on the sound of their voice and their ‘huge’ talent. I’ve met singer-songwriters at open mic nights that have more talent in their plectrum than a sounder* of X-Factor finalists. Recently someone called Sophie Habibis sang “Wherever You Will Go” on X-Factor, but amazingly she wasn’t covering The Calling, she was covering a cover-version released by Charlene Soraia. Now whoever heard of a cover, being covered?! The sad reality is that younger generations will probably think that “WYWG” was written by Soraia herself; the same way that perhaps many think that Leona Lewis’ cover of Snow Patrol’s “Run” was her original work of art…

I’m not knocking entertainment value but I am having a dig at so called ‘artists’ who ‘make it’ singing other (and way more talented) artists work. I quite liked Damon Rice’s original ‘Cannonball’ but then, again in my opinion, it has been ruined by Little Mix and it makes a mockery of true talent. They don’t even operate complex harmonies and that song is just crying out for something like that!!!!

While I think that most covers should be confined to pub Karaoke, Open Mic nights and tribute bands that comprise of four overweight gents in their late 40’s, I do believe that covers can augment an original set, so I’m not dead set against them – I just hate seeing them propel singers (note I didn’t say artists) to heady heights, giving them a false sense of self-assured giftedness which I do not believe they possess.

Noel Gallagher once said of the long-forgotten Rick Waller, “Where’s his guitar? Has he written any songs?” and then Noel just shrugged his shoulders and smirked. To me, that said it all.

*Google collective nouns